Establishing mutual pleasure during sex can be difficult. It requires a great deal of knowledge about you and your partner’s body, a great sense of comfort & safety and a healthy attitude toward your own sexuality. For the anatomy bit, many women do not climax during penile-vaginal intercourse. The vaginal canal actually has very few nerve endings. The clitoris, however, has as many nerve endings as a man’s penis. In order to orgasm, you need to touch what works. During intercourse, the clitoris rarely gets touched. Some women learn to orgasm through intercourse with practice. Since your clitoris — the most sensitive body part on a woman — is not located inside your vagina, reaching an orgasm through intercourse is difficult. While you are making love with your partner inside you, touch, press, and rub your clitoris with your fingers. You may have to move your body so that you can do this, and that can be part of the fun. It really is okay, too, if you have your orgasms before or after intercourse. Your body is unique! It can help to become familiar with your body and your likes & dislikes with masturbation. Becoming comfortable with you physical sexuality through self-pleasure can help you communicate your needs to your partner.

You might also want to consider your emotions and mentality about sexual activity. Are you comfortable with you partner? Can you communicate with your partner? Do you feel safe and protected? All of these questions and more can influence your sexual experience. Being sexually active is about a lot more than just your physical body. Talk to your partner or someone you trust about your emotional sexual experience. You may discover that the state of your orgasm has much to do with the state of your mind and relationship as well as your anatomy.

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